After 50, learn to shut up and not talk about these five things
01 “Fan Si Xun” said: “smell slander and not angry, though slander flame fuming heaven, like fire to burn empty, will eventually self-rest.”If you ignore the evil words, they will disappear and do you no harm.Such a state is what we need to pursue, but it is difficult to achieve.In ordinary times, we not only listen to unpleasant things, but also say unpleasant things.Even if it is very silent people, also can not do for a long time “silent”.Therefore, we should learn some ways to correct, on the one hand is selective chat, on the other hand is the initiative to admit mistakes and reflection.For people in their fifties, here are a few things it’s best not to say, depending on the situation.First, when it comes to children’s future, silence means “let nature take its course”.There is a man named Zhou Guoneng who was born in Dalu village of CAI Zhou in the Song Dynasty in the second volume of The Book.He liked to play chess since he was a child, and he beat all the best players in the nearby village.When Zhou guoneng grew up, his parents offered him marriage, but he refused all of them.He said, “I am a chess player. How can I pick a peasant girl?I’m going to find a woman like me.”Parents said: “we don’t stop you, just have a family, don’t forget home.”Later, zhou neng went to bianliang and Liao.He found a female chess player of the Liao state as his wife.When you are fifty years old and your children have grown up, they want to get married and settle down. This is a big thing in your mind, but you should not interfere too much, let alone complain.Life is only once, everyone is responsible for their own life.The bitter to eat, to eat;The blessing, to fight for their own, parents can not replace.With children, you need to know the difference between mentoring and leading.If you often complain about your children and kidnap them with morality, you will become a “leader” and limit their future.Letting go is love, and shutting up is the main way to let go.Second, shutting up prejudice against daughters-in-law and sons-in-law means “respecting”.As the saying goes, “People are more angry than others.”Everyone wants their children to have a happy family and find a virtuous object.Unfortunately, children like people, parents do not necessarily like;Parents like people, children do not want to accept.The fate of the world, always can not have the best of both worlds.There is a legend that the seven fairies of the Heavenly Palace fell in love with Dong Yong, who was selling himself to bury his father, while playing on Ling Xu Tai.So, with the help of her sisters, she went down to earth, married Dong Yong, made a lot of cloth, and let Dong Yong buy her freedom.Just as the seven Fairies were living a happy life with Dong Yong, the Jade Emperor sent his men to snatch the seven Fairies back to heaven.From then on, leaving a sad ending.Of course, a fairy married to a farmer, too inappropriate.As a parents-in-law, I’m sure I have a problem.But isn’t a peasant happy to marry a fairy?Everyone likes to be a “social climber”, but not a “low match”.This truth, in the hearts of parents, take root.In the era of free love, parents should put aside prejudice and welcome their daughters-in-law and sons-in-law no matter who they are.Say a few less eccentric words, do not protect, respect is, the family will be more harmonious.04 Third, to the anger of brothers and sisters, silence is “forgiveness”.We treat the wealth of our grandparents as family heirlooms.In traditional thinking, heirlooms are “gold, jade, ancestral home” and so on.Few people think that a true family heirloom is a spiritual treasure.It is better to leave a sunny attitude, friendly family atmosphere, good family tradition and entrepreneurial skills to your children than gold and silver mountains.By the time you are 50, your parents are very old and even have passed away.Therefore, siblings are the closest people.If you don’t deal well with siblings, there will be hatred.You must not take “hatred” as talk, let the children to do revenge, sow discord;Let the neighbors laugh;Let the deathbed parents chill.As the saying goes, there is no feud between generations.In any place, don’t talk about your brother or sister’s anger, it means that you have forgiven and can communicate freely in the future.Your generosity is part of the family heirloom.Fourth, to keep silent about one’s property is “retreat”.By the time we are in our fifties, most of us have some savings and a pension.Many parents, in order to see their children to start a business, took out a large sum of money, expressed support;There are also some parents who say, “Don’t worry, I lost money, I still have money.”One after another, the children will spend money freely, do not hesitate to start a business, resulting in the family quickly become poor.If they meet a black sheep, they will try their best to take their parents’ money.Talk to your children about money, but don’t “give up”.After all, old age depends on you.Also, with the development of the economy, after 10 years, 20 years, your money, of course, will depreciate.You do not be happy too early, but also learn to stingy, let the value of wealth.06 Fifth, to their marriage, shut up is “cherish”.Many couples, in the quarrel, as soon as they open their mouth, they say “when you were so poor, I married you;I forgave you for betraying your family;Your mother gave me the cold shoulder. “This is true, but don’t mention it, it’s offensive.To be a man, learn to forgive and forget.We should also be tolerant of the difficulties and contradictions we face and do not open our mouths.Husband and wife get along, trivial things, will become the source of conflict.You say big, big;You don’t say it, it just disappears.Husband and wife together through the wind and rain, the road of the future, is to see the scenery together, why because of unpleasant words, destroy the scenery?To understand, over 50 years, marriage is already a “board nailed” thing, you have to toss about, is to pull out a nail, leaving a wound.Learn to live with a smile, is right.07 ancients said: “the world is always by reason, the sea duckweed accidental.”In this life, the people and things we meet, the money we get, are all fate.So we have to know how to choose, do not let “a few words”, drive away the fate.It seems that life is magnificent and vigorous, and there will be thousands of people and things to meet. But if you think about it seriously, in addition to life and death, the other things are small;Accompany you to the old people, that is, the side of a few relatives.Therefore, we should guard our mouth, do not push relatives to the outside.”Shut up” is a kind of cultivation, “open” is a spring breeze.Author: Cloth clothes coarse food.Pay attention to my words, into your heart.The illustrations are from the Internet.